Your part of a tribe and might not even realize it. If your working for a company, you’re part of a tribe. If your going to the gym semi-regular, you’re part of a tribe. The tribe itself is not the cool part. It’s what they can provide for you and what you are responsible for giving back that makes it special.
The gift of a tribe? A shared cause. I can’t tell you how greatful I am for my run group. We’re just trying to stay running and get better. We hold each other accountable. Lift each other up for the bigger races. It’s a shared focus & drive.
Think about the last time you where together with your tribe (friends, family, or co-workers) and a couple of you were happy. Eventually, that happiness carries to the others. Shared joy is absolutely shared joy doubled! An incredible gift when you need that boost to get by or need the catalyst to leveling up.
Our good friends we can trust and talk to. Incredible gifts. We need to intentionally try and maintain these circle of friends we have. Who have we lost contact that we need to reach out to and reconnect?
“Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead. Don ‘t walk in front of me, I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”
– Albert Camus
There are three exercises I practice regularly to reconnect with my circles I’ve acted to busy to reach out to. Here’s three that are simple to start with. Each one to the next as a progression and harder as you go:
① I choose a random person I’ve not reached out to for a bit and drop in with an email or text to say “What’s up?”
② Next level and a little tougher to do, I schedule a phone call. I put no pressure onto them or it. Sometimes it’s just more rewarding to connect verbally.
③ I’ll sometimes think about someone that changed my life & write them a gratitude letter. Sharing about the gift they once gave me and how today I’m still using it is really powerful for the other person to hear.
It’s important to reflect inwardly on this gift our tribes, circles, social hangs, or communities have given us then pay it forward. What can you leave behind instead of always take this holiday? I know we don’t always mean to drain other people’s wells and be greedy, it can happen to anyone. Taking an intentional pause with yourself and writing some answers to those three questions above are a great way to get you back into appreciating gifts others have given you that transcend the material.
It’s so important to remember that friendship isn’t just about the gift given that’s enriched our lives, but also the role we can play in another.
In trying to honor the gift try these questions out with yourself.
– In what ways could you improve as a friend?
– Is there a time where you could have put you friend’s weeds in front of yours, but then didn’t?
– In what ways do you think you ‘ve been a great steward of the gifts you’ve been blessed with in your life?
“Aristotle’s opinion was that friends hold a mirror up to each other; through that mirror they can see each other in ways that would not otherwise be accessible to them, and it is this (reciprocal) mirroring that helps them improve themselves as persons.” -Massimo Pig liucci
Pretty powerful gift. One also, that outlasts any holiday and has the power to change the world one community at a time.